Uncategorized 3:01 am
So tonight was the finale of House and Boston Legal. Although House was of course Awesome I hve to give it to Boston Legal.
In other news I’m really horny. No matter how many times I spank the monkey the butt does not turn red. I need to cut a testicle off.
I have to pee. Why doesn’t my blatter come with an eject button?
I need more heels. I like feeling tall.
If you want to marry me my finger is bare.
Uncategorized 5:58 pm
So I got a Black Berry. I am really excited. I am most certain I do not need one. But still. Let’s try to organize my life. Also a friend gave me a link of my performance from Miss Paul Tulane. Let me know that you saw it. Aurora Cecile is famous.
[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IWYlpDKqekY]
Uncategorized 10:12 pm
Ok for yentel being jewish the song should be mama can you hear me? I know it changes the plot of the entire movie but jewish mother. I don’t care if they can’t be rabbis in the movie. At least do like a dance remix. Or maybe Joss Stone should release another cover album. I need to do a little rant on the parental units now. So like most patriotic americans we are driving to some far far away land for memorial day. Well my parents decided that the perfect place to stay would be my brother’s apartment. Let me give you the facts: Have you heard of my brother? probably not which means he isn’t rich and famous, he haas a full size bed, a pull out couch, a floor, one tv and a bathroom smaller than my penis. And the original plan was to stay there for three nights. Naturally I had a slight porblem with this. Becuase as much as I like to get fucked I’d rather not get the shit end of the stick. Becuase I would be stuck with nothing to do for days at a time there. Then after some more arguing my mom said this was supposed to be the celebration for her birthday. Getting to do what she wants. To end I would just like to say Jesus doesn’t demand this much attention on Christmas and Easter combined.
Uncategorized 6:21 am
So at 1 am with exhaustion setting in and the alcohol flowing through my veins Bryan cannot sleep. Sure my feet sound like sand paper when I rup them together but time still ticks away. In my drunkn stuper with my apparent effort to the english language (or at least the best I can do)I do have some emotions left that did not come from the finales’ of Ugly Betty and Grey’s Anatomy. I miss somebody who I only talked to online for two weeks and met in person twice. Why is this sad situation conquering my thoughts? This one person althought lacking in time managed to make me feel happier then my friends, my family, the current romantic interest I posses, and the greatest attraction towards another individual I have ever felt. Am I that desperate to feel emotion from another? Am I that empty to cling to any kiss from another, holding from the hands, text message saying how I make them happy that I cannot sleep. I am just left with two thoughts. One is still the I fucked it up. Granted I did wrong but the other still over reacted. My small mistake was used as an excuse to fall in love with somebdoy else they “have known for a while.” Does this mean that they were going around behind my back or just wating for me to slip up so they could have an easy decision to make? I will never find the answer (I would not even have the courage to write this blog if it were not for skyy vodka thank you to that lovely company). My other thought is that I am a weak person. This specimine is the object of my thoughts. This insignificant portion of my life still occupies any part of me. Am I that longing for any sort of validation? I just but can’t help think of what I missed whether me and this other man would have been the best thing for each other or if I was being played the entire time? Either way I know now that I am left with my iTunes catalogue, tv and dvd’s of tv shows, and a Ben and Jerry’s Factory to satisfy my lust for eternal happiness.
Uncategorized 4:01 pm
So remember when you were a little kid and spelling that fucking state was the biggest accomplishment once could achieve. Looking back on it that is one of the easiest states to spell. Besides the states that are really easy to sound out like Washington and Indiana. I real accomplishment with the states would be remember which one is Vermont and which one is New Hampshire. So I just called to find out what to do for my speeding ticket. Fucking $155. Isn’t that like half the state budget?
In other new I saw the movie Georgia rules. It is the most amazing movie ever. I hope I get an oscar for best audience member. It was me and my friend and like 10 old ladies. After the movie was over one of the red hat society members said “That was an excellent story from start to finish.” I just wanted to look back and go it spoke to me in my heart. So go see it.
Uncategorized 4:26 pm
So today marks the first day of my usual job when I am home from school. This would mean I get to play the pretty receptionist. I answer phone calls and basically sit on the computer for my large pay. I really need a pencil skirt. Especially when the boss (the only other employee) is on vacation I have nothing to do. My blog is going to get more attention than my penis this summer. I may have to start writing about current events throwing in my witty two words. Yeah Tehran get ready for Aurora Cecile to bring it. So while sitting at my over sized desk a cute little man walked by. He wasn’t so much little as like 5′10 and not so much a man but a college student. He either was Jewish and came in just to use the restroom (I sympathize with George Michael a lot more now) or needed to get the church that shares the building and there front door was locked. But he was cute. I wish I could have made friends with him and spent our summer down in the sand. Oh well he is gone. Hopefully not forever. SO for mother’s day we went to brunch and it was terrible. There was almost no food out and the food that was out was ice cold. And the melon was so sour i spit it out. The manager then came and apologized and gave it to us for free which frankly was still too expensive. But I guess it was fitting for my mother. Latter that night when Zoe and I went to waffle house we saw him and he just tried to hide his face with his hand. I wish he wasn’t so ashamed I know it wasn’t his fault. I would have fucked him to cheer him up.
Speaking of fucking let’s talk about manhunt now. They have a list of people who have viewed your profile if the person doesn’t click that option off. Well after having everybody and their queen mother look at mine nobody has messaged me. Oh well. The other thing that really bothers me is all the bitches who put discreet on theirs. First of all although more rare there are people who put discreet because they are not out but have their face picture and bottom only on their profile. I think if you have another gay horny employee in your office you are SOL. plus when you sit down on your chair but slide half of it into you they’ll suspect something. Next how can you not be discreet on manhunt. It’s not like there is a website showing all hook ups off of manhunt.
Uncategorized 3:14 am
So after a nicei 12 hour drive Zoe and I made it to my home. We wanted to leave at noon. I realistically thought about one. We left at three thirty. We got back at four am the next morning. On the way I got to expierence cracker barrel and zoe got to expierience jack in the box. Besides that we drove through literally a wall of rain and fog so thick we couldn’t see the hand in front of our face. And that was even in the car. Outside was worse. Besides that all that happend was that started to hallucinate for the last half hour. All that leaves is that Zoe got to talk to my parents. She feels bad for me. Now i just have three months of boredom. entertain me and can we say dollar bills. That is all
Uncategorized 8:29 am
I decided to write an end of semester blog. Withou a doubt this has to come at 3:20 in the morning. That would be the terrible insomnia I have had this semester. But at least it was because I had a fun night out. I have realized alcohol and make things more enjoyable. Also certain people that one spends their time with cane increase happiness. All O have to say is I don’t want to finish packing. I would also appreciate somebody else just teleporting me back home. Well perferablly I wouldn’t have to go home at all. It really isn’t fair I meet a great guy with mutual attraction and I have to leave. This one doesn’t even claim that I have an infectious disease like bravado. It also sucks that every picture I took of him is really bad. Well I should get to bed to get my five hours of sleep. I woudl just like to say on this closing not of the semester that schol sucks, life is unfair. and the feelings towards another can make you pretend like the first two don’t exisit at all.
Uncategorized 7:18 pm
Only two pm and wow my day has been exciting. Although in a nice ambien cr sleep the rain still woke me up it was so hard. To which I see text messages. One of which being the guy I like is at the pub. Too bad I msised him but he said he would come this weekend. Last sunday he walked me to my car. And gave me a sweet peck good night. By that I mean a kiss on the lips not like he used a sharp object to stab me. So with those response texts and the ones from when i had to be at 8 I had ten more in my inbox just from when i was supposed to be sleeping
It’s Raining really hard. I’m calling it katrina 2. Outside of where I had my sceince test it was up to my knee. Let me remind you that I am 6′3. My knee is like up to where Napal is. My asshole being the cave they just discovered of course.
That’s me celebrating
